STEP 1: EVALUATE THE IMMEDIACY OR SEVERITY OF THE CRISIS

Assess the potential for suicide by using the following lethality scale to guide your discussion with your friend:

1. Gender: The potential is higher if your friend is male or a first-year female student.
2. Symptoms: The potential is greater if your friend shows physical symptoms of depression and feelings of great dispair.
3. Stress: The potential is greater if your friend is under stress from exams, pressure from parents, pressure to be admitted into graduate school, etc.
4. Suicide Plan: The potential is greater if the plan is more detailed, especially when your friend has access to a means (gun, drugs, etc.) and when the method is highly lethal
5. Family and Friends: The potiential is greater if your friend is a loner in the living unit, has no family or close friends, or experiences family as rejecting or punitive.
6. Past History: The potential is greater if your friend has attempted suicide previously. Or if a family member or significant other has committed suicide.
7. Available Support/Communication Aspects: The potential is greater if your friend has no outlets for communication with others about her/his problems.
8. Spiritual Crisis: The potential is greater if your friend feels s/he can no longer pray.
9. Medical Condition: The potiential is greater if your friend has a severe medical illness or an addiction: alcoholism or other chemical dependency.
10. Sudden Change in Behavior: The potential is greater if your friend experiences a sudden unexplained improvement or peacefulness.

STEP 2: DISCUSS YOUR FRIEND'S REASONS FOR WANTING TO TAKE HIS/HER LIFE AND REASONS FOR LIVING

People who are suicidal haven't killed themselves yet because they are ambivalent about it. Focus on your friend's ambivalence. Ask, "If you've been thinking about hurting yourself since _____, what has kept you from killing yourself so far?" Listen to his/her answer, and then stress the reasons s/he has offerred for living. Don't get into a debate and argue your own reasons why you think your friend should live.

STEP 3: DISCUSS YOUR FRIEND'S COPING STRATEGIES

Ask what your friend has done so far to cope with the problem, find out what has worked before and what hasn't.

STEP 4: NEGOTIATE A "NO SUICIDE" AGREEMENT

Ask your friend to agree not to commit suicide at any time. If your friend will not agree to this contract or tries to change it to a certain time, call the University Counseling Center (631-7336).

STEP 5: ASSESS THE AVAILABILITY OF OTHERS TO HELP

Such as your friend's roommate, friends, rector, Campus Ministry, University Counseling Center. Tell your friend that you cannot be the only person who can help him/her. If your friend wants you to keep this "a secret," tell your friend firmly but warmly that you cannot do this. Insist that your friend seek help from someone in addition to you.

STEP 6: HELP YOUR FRIEND DETERMINE A POSITIVE COURSE OF ACTION

1. Assess the problem.
2. Brainstorm alternatives and consider the consequences of each.
3. Identify specific responsibilities for both you and your friend.
4. Determine a timetable.
5. Schedule another time to meet with your friend.
6. Summarize what has been accomplished and feedback the actions your friend will take to help alleviate the crisis.

REMEMBER: You cannot take responsibility for the actions of another individual, but you can assist him or her in making a positive decision to live.