Hurling a turtleneck into my duffle bag, I realize that I do not even know what clothes to pack for the Nov. 9-10 Freshman Retreat that starts in 20 minutes. I have no idea what I should be expecting, what kind of activities I will be participating in, what kind of people I will soon meet. It is Freshman Orientation all over again.

The walk to the Coleman Morse Center is a blur as my mind contemplates all of the things that could go wrong. I enter room 114 to find a handful of girls already seated and settle into a comfortable couch, expecting to pass the time in isolated silence. Instead, I am instantly greeted by a flurry of conversation and welcoming handshakes.

After arriving at Sacred Heart Parish Center, the retreat leaders orchestrate an icebreaker, then progress to a discussion of the difficulties in transitioning from high school to Notre Dame. After listening to their talk, I join fellow freshman in discussion of what we have just heard. I realize that my difficulties are not unique — each freshman explains some of the uncertainties they have faced since arriving on campus. I no longer feel alone.

The 25 freshman and I spend the night in prayer, contemplation and a game of Mafia, which I lose. Being Italian, I should have some advantage, but no. We dance, mingle, discuss and reflect. I find myself laughing more than I have recently and stay up until 3, not caring if I am tired the following morning.

Sitting outside on the final day of the retreat, the brilliance of the Golden Dome looms beyond the placidity of St. Joseph's Lake and the abundance of trees whose golden leaves make the ground erupt with color. I spend a moment in quiet reflection, then turn my attention to the nine undergraduates in my small discussion group whose faith, intelligence, and compassion echo the physical beauty of my surroundings. With them, I share things I have not spoken about to anybody at Notre Dame. They listen, patiently, as I unburden myself, then do the same. We watch the football game and cheer as the Irish pull out a close one. The day concludes with a Mass and a multitude of hugs.

I join past graduates and leaders of freshman retreats the following night as we join our hands in unified prayer at the Grotto, a weekly rite. After the intentions are said, I clutch the borrowed rosary beads of a friend as a group member leads us in the Apostles' Creed. I begin the rosary haltingly, as I have not said it in years, but I find the words coming easier. I take courage in knowing that I will have many weeks of practice. I have heard so much about the Notre Dame family, but they were always just words. Now, I begin to experience it.

The views expressed in the Inside Column are those of the author and not necessarily those of The Observer.

Contact Joe Trombello at jtrombel@nd.edu.

• Sharing the freshman experience