Avoid raunchy `Tomcats' at all costs
JUDE SEYMOUR
Scene Movie Critic
"Tomcats" is a waste of celluloid, a waste of money and a waste of time. After 105 minutes, it led this reviewer to one conclusion: it is the worst movie he has ever seen. "Tomcats'" combination of disgusting humor, atrocious acting and idiotic plots are only three reasons why no one should see this movie.
In the film, Michael Delaney (Jerry O'Connell) has to come up with $51,000 in three days after a bad run in a casino. The only way to come up with that much money quickly is to marry off his friend, Kyle (Jake Busey). Kyle and Michael are the two remaining "tomcats" (bachelors) from a bet amongst friends seven years ago which stipulated the last man to get married would collect a pot, which incidentally has reached a half million dollars. When Kyle mentions his one chance at "true love" was with Natalie Parker (Shannon Elizabeth), Michael takes off to find Natalie and set the two up again.
The movie assembles the most stereotypical men to play this group of friends. Their misogynistic lifestyles and haphazard attitudes concerning relationships would make them devoid of female companionship in any reality. These men, however, are portrayed as god-like; women cannot help but line up to have sexual intercourse with them. The entire movie plays out as a warped male fantasy. That theme has been brought to screen before; it was called "Road Trip." "Road Trip," despite all its faults, never suggested that a woman would be so empty-headed as to enjoy being run over by a golf cart as "Tomcats" does however.
The movie does not seem to mind its transparent nature, however. The transparency of the characters complements the transparent plot perfectly. It was mentioned that Michael takes off to find Natalie. Since the two meet, even the most casual moviegoer can figure out what happens next.
The gross-out action sequences are the movie's worst insult to its audience. One scene, in particular, "climaxes" with a man eating a cancerous testicle as if it were a pastry. In the age of gross-out jokes, "Tomcats" has crossed the line of good taste. The audience moans in horror at such a thing being displayed on screen.
This review is giving more time to a movie that doesn't need a single word printed on its behalf. Life is precious, and "Tomcats" wants to defile 105 minutes of your existence. Heed the advice given in this column, and find a better way to spend your afternoon.
--zero out of five shamrocks
All Scene Stories for Thursday, April 5, 2001
