Last weekend I faked an orgasm in front of my mother and 20,00 perfect strangers. Sitting in Madison Square Garden, I marveled as the entire arena erupted into a jubilant, orgasmic yell. Laughing, I turned towards my mother and wasn't a bit embarrassed.

In fact, I had never felt so proud to be a woman. When she called me up two weeks ago and asked if I wanted to fly to New York to see the "Vagina Monologues," I was floored – my mother is about as Catholic and conservative as they come.

So when she told me that her friends had planned an entire trip around seeing this controversial play, I was more than a little intrigued. I told her I was up for it.

I'll never forget that evening. A rally organized for "V-Day" – a movement fighting to end violence against women, included an extended version of the "Monologues." Playwright Eve Ensler hosted the event, and even directed the audience in faking that orgasm – a unique mother-daughter bonding experience, to say the least.

That night I saw Jane Fonda enraptured by the miracle of giving birth. Oprah's haunting voice described the oppression faced by women in Afghanistan. Survivors of rape and female genital mutilation wept as they told their stories. And my mother and I, her friends and their daughters, shared it all.

We roared with laughter, we sobbed, we sat stunned at the testimonies we heard. Then we stood when Ensler asked who knew a survivor of rape or assault.

There was one face missing, one who understood better than any of us the reality of sexual assault. And because she couldn't be there that night, we rose and stood for her. To me, this is what the "Monologues" are about – giving a voice to victims of sexual assault, empowering men and women to fight against violence. When I returned Monday night and announced to my roommates that I loved my vagina, they were slightly taken aback.

But as I told them about my weekend, they became intrigued, maybe even envious. I felt proud to be a woman, I told them. I felt comfortable enough to talk with my mother about anything. And I understood that in order for things to change, maybe we had to shake things up a little and talk about our vaginas.

My roommates didn't get to see the "Monologues" this year. But maybe they will next year, thanks to groups like C.A.R.E. and the Saint Mary's women who continue to read the play, hoping its message will be heard. Regardless of administrative rulings, the V-Day movement is growing, working all over the globe to stop violence against women.

If you believe that all women should be able to live in freedom and safety, then don't let the censorship of a play keep you silent. Male or female, you can make a difference – in the jokes you tell, the attitudes you live by, the causes you fight for and the victims you pray for.

That's what the "Vagina Monologues" are all about.

• Vagina Pride