Appreciating the holiday season
By Gary Caruso
Capitol Comments
Turn to page 23 of Notre Dame's 1974 Dome yearbook. It shows a picture of two students looking out of separate windows in Dillon Hall. On the left is a student flashing the "peace" symbol typical of the Vietnam era, holding two fingers in the form of a "V." On the right, lurking in the shadow of the window screen and hard to see, is my friend Joe Schmitz.
It was 30 years ago this month that I, a senior, met the underclassman Joe. We quickly became friends and stayed in touch for several years after graduation. But today, he is as ghostly as his image on page 23. We lost touch of each other, and for almost 20 years now we have had no contact.
Many years ago, I sent Joe a Christmas card containing a three-page note. It was returned with the addressee unknown. Today it sits in a drawer waiting for another sending, but without a hope of ever being sent. Despite all of the Internet tracking technology and Notre Dame databases, Joe has been lost.
That yearbook is one of a limited reminders I have of a good friendship during my senior year.
I think back to the holiday decorations I had on my dormitory door during those long-lost days at Notre Dame. Twinkling lights, probably banned in the dorms today, surrounded an irreverent Santa with his slightly impaired reindeer, each of which held various alcohol and drug paraphernalia. Today I feel like Scrooge peering with the Ghost of Christmas Past at his boyhood campus.
All of us have pictures of yesterday's Christmas eras. My family has boxes full of World War II era photographs featuring most of my deceased relatives. I wonder if those days were as warm as the memories the photographs instill in me today. They give me an incentive to appreciate this holiday season as it unfolds so my digital photographs will mean more in years to come.
This season is like the calm before the storm, both politically and economically. We have a president intent upon waging war with Iraq regardless of the findings of United Nations' inspectors. With it will come casualties both American and otherwise. How many of those who are nearing the end of their lives on earth are exerting a special effort to appreciate the events of this month?
Throughout the world, families are preparing to celebrate this holiday season. For some, they will lose a loved one before they can celebrate together. For others, this will be the last holiday they will celebrate with their families. Are any of them making a personal effort to celebrate as though it was their last?
It is easy for us to ignore global politics while focusing on our personal lives. It is easy for us to limit our sights on what immediately affects us without considering how delightful that experience may be in relation to others. It is difficult for us to separate each day and live it with such zeal that it seems longer than a mere 24 hours.
Ironically, we focus on tragedy and unpleasant experiences. Tomorrow we commemorate the 61st anniversary of a day that lived in infamy at Pearl Harbor. Unless that day is a birthday or wedding anniversary, it remains a negative blot on our calendars.
This writer has no magic formula for appreciating life other than to be aware of the moment as it unfolds. Having lost my father two years ago, I can look back and appreciate various moments we shared together. In hindsight, I would have savored those moments more intensely as they occurred rather than just to have "attended" those times. And while today I still have such incredible memories of those experiences, I have learned to intensify my personal attendance in my contemporary life.
In the spirit of the holiday season from brown-tinged photographs of the Civil War, black and white photographs of soldiers during World War II or colored photographs of Notre Dame in 1974, we make our existence meaningful through our appreciation of events as they unfold throughout our lives. Make this month as meaningful as it unfolds. Someday, it may only be a blurred image in next spring's yearbook.
Gary J. Caruso, Notre Dame class of 1973, served in President Clinton's administration as a Congressional and Public Affairs Director. His column appears every other Friday. Contact him at Hottline@aol.com.
The views expressed in this column are those of the author and not necessarily those of The Observer.
All Viewpoint Stories for Friday, December 6, 2002
